Recently I went to a function of a college when Vice chancellor of that university announced a 4 year grant for a very poor student. The ecstatic student went up to the VC at the end of the function and said “You are the best person who I have come across in my whole life”. And I agreed. But I was the same person who really was upset when the same grant was not given to a poor student known to our family for years.
I have contradicted myself in so many situations and for over so many years.I have come to ask myself a question..what defines a good act and a bad act?I have aften found myself weighing that any act of mine was good or was that bad? We all at some point we all percieve things as good or bad.Our basic problem is that we seek clarity between the good and the bad.Whereas if we see both rely on their own contexts.Although I think a lot on these lines still but this does not deter me from doing what is generally thought of correct in the worldly context. I just question it whenever I get stuck in a “think or throw” type of thought. In moments where I dont know if I should forgive a person or be forgiven? There is a small story by a famous visionary which helps me. It goes like :
In a faraway small village, there lived a bunch of conservative families where falling in love and getting married was a stigma. There lived a carpenter who had a docile girl.She got married with the consent of her parents and invited the whole village for the extravagant wedding. The wedding had various delicacies and everybody was given a box of sweets that was the main attraction . For months villagers remembered that ‘box of sweets’ that was given with so much benevolence. On the contrary , one night a barber’s daughter from the same village eloped with a guy from a nearby village and left a goodbye letter for her parents.None knew that where she eloped.There was no wedding, no villagers were invited and hence ‘no box of sweets’ were given as the girl just eloped. Few months later both the girls in separate incidences fought with thier respective husbands and came back home to live with their parents. Villagers supported the carpenters daughter and poured all their love to her as compared to barbers daughter and bad mouthed her.For the villagers, carpenters daughter was good and barbers daughter was bad and they asked her to leave the village. Howsoever upset barber was with her daughter, he still disliked the villagers descision. The King of the village was approached to give the descision as to who was right and who was wrong? After listening carefully, the king gave his verdict and that was :
“The difference between good and bad is only ‘a box of sweets’ that was given for the carpenters daughter wedding and that could not happen for the barber’s daughter wedding because she eloped”.
This story will stay with me forever and will guide me when my mind becomes full of expectations and my demands become unnecessary, when I am driven to believe that I am good and such an such person is bad. I will just think ‘there lies a context that I may not see, but exists still”.